If the noses came in green, I might be interested.
1.31.2011
1.26.2011
1.24.2011
1.19.2011
1.18.2011
The Social Network: Dislike Button
The Social Network is a popular flick about the guy who created Facebook who doesn't have any friends. Get it?
I finally caught this fictional account of the birth of my favorite diversion on the flight home from London. I'd been putting it off because I simply cannot tolerate Justin Timberlake's curly mop, harelip and lady voice ... and Jessie Eisenberg's curly mop, translucent skin and beady eyes.
But, since it was a 7+ hour flight, and it had won a Golden Shower Award the night before, I buckled up, ordered a G&T and took it on.
After the first 10 minutes, I realized I had actually seen it before when it was called The West Wing. Or was it called A Few Good Men? Or was it Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip? The Farnsworth Invention? I dunno. Seemed like I was visiting an old acquaintance. Yakkity, yakkity, yak.
Same sarcastic, privileged characters who all speak with the same rapid-fire-wise-ass dialogue. Same quips. Same turns of phrase. Same old coked-up Sorkin-speak.
While I always enjoyed David Fincher's Madonna videos, his heavy hand in anything longer than a pop song wears me the hell down. Fight Club? Panic Room? Se7en? It's like he directs films for the blind and deaf.
Did you notice the subtle metaphors? Oh. You must've been updating your status.
Just when the race is on for the Winkelvoss twins to cease Zuckerberg's idea hijacking ... we cut to the twins in their boats, RACING. Get it? THE RACE IS ON.
Just when poor, abused Saverin is trying to stop the out-of-control madness of his business pal, we cut to him trying to literally put out a FIRE. Get it? PUTTING OUT FIRES.
When Timberlake's girly-voiced character turns the workplace into a party zone and the company is clearly getting out of control, the LIGHTS GO OUT. Get it? LIGHTS OUT/PARTY'S OVER.
Heck, when we first meet Sean Parker, the founder of Napster, he is played by a MUSICIAN. Get it? A MUSICIAN PLAYING A MUSIC MOGUL. Hardee har har.
Don't even get me started on Sorkin's quick-talking cameo. I said, don't.
While I do applaud the creators for making a somewhat entertaining movie about young people who type fast and talk about numbers, I will forever be puzzled about why this mythical TV movie is the talk of the Hollywood award season. Just because it's popular, doesn't mean it's good.
And now, I will post this on Facebook.
Get it?
I finally caught this fictional account of the birth of my favorite diversion on the flight home from London. I'd been putting it off because I simply cannot tolerate Justin Timberlake's curly mop, harelip and lady voice ... and Jessie Eisenberg's curly mop, translucent skin and beady eyes.
But, since it was a 7+ hour flight, and it had won a Golden Shower Award the night before, I buckled up, ordered a G&T and took it on.
After the first 10 minutes, I realized I had actually seen it before when it was called The West Wing. Or was it called A Few Good Men? Or was it Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip? The Farnsworth Invention? I dunno. Seemed like I was visiting an old acquaintance. Yakkity, yakkity, yak.
Same sarcastic, privileged characters who all speak with the same rapid-fire-wise-ass dialogue. Same quips. Same turns of phrase. Same old coked-up Sorkin-speak.
While I always enjoyed David Fincher's Madonna videos, his heavy hand in anything longer than a pop song wears me the hell down. Fight Club? Panic Room? Se7en? It's like he directs films for the blind and deaf.
Did you notice the subtle metaphors? Oh. You must've been updating your status.
Just when the race is on for the Winkelvoss twins to cease Zuckerberg's idea hijacking ... we cut to the twins in their boats, RACING. Get it? THE RACE IS ON.
Just when poor, abused Saverin is trying to stop the out-of-control madness of his business pal, we cut to him trying to literally put out a FIRE. Get it? PUTTING OUT FIRES.
When Timberlake's girly-voiced character turns the workplace into a party zone and the company is clearly getting out of control, the LIGHTS GO OUT. Get it? LIGHTS OUT/PARTY'S OVER.
Heck, when we first meet Sean Parker, the founder of Napster, he is played by a MUSICIAN. Get it? A MUSICIAN PLAYING A MUSIC MOGUL. Hardee har har.
Don't even get me started on Sorkin's quick-talking cameo. I said, don't.
While I do applaud the creators for making a somewhat entertaining movie about young people who type fast and talk about numbers, I will forever be puzzled about why this mythical TV movie is the talk of the Hollywood award season. Just because it's popular, doesn't mean it's good.
And now, I will post this on Facebook.
Get it?
1.07.2011
Banish These 6 Words
"AT THE END OF THE DAY"
Friends and reality stars - I urge you to banish these words from your conversations. They are unnecessary. We get it. You are wrapping up your point. Try finishing your thoughts with a simple period ... or by downing a shot of liquor. Or by storming the barricade.
1.04.2011
1.03.2011
Bad News Bike Rack
Saw this lovely display of homeless ingenuity ...
Then I noticed this very official note attached to the shopping cart ...
Some homeless people are such dicks.
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